If I got a dollar for every time I said: "Thank you for politely listening right away!" ... I'd start saying it all the time. Not because it was true, but because it would be nice to be a salaried parent. And I'd be saying something that--when true--probably makes you feel like a really amazing [...]
Be Fearless
"Eenie, meenie, miny, moe, Catch a tiger by the . . . face! " "Do you mean, 'Catch a tiger by the *toe*'?" "Nope." Go out there, friends, and catch the tiger by the face.
The Things They Handed Me
Small children value, trust, and appreciate parents. I can tell. Why else would they think we should get to hold their weird treasures and see and touch their disgusting trash without fear that we are judging them? Well, sometimes I am judging them. And kids over the years have handed me some ridiculous things. So, so many apple [...]
That Girl’s Got it Figured Out
Me: Ella, please come in to help set the table for dinner. Ella: I am not [Ella]. I am Queen Chila. Me: Queen Chila? Ella: Yes. I am a ruler of a far-away land. Me: I see. And what brings you to my kitchen? Ella: I am on vacation here. Vacation from all my problems. [...]
Do It Myself
D2 is getting older. Three, to be exact, which is pretty big and grown-up. And she is ready to do all sorts of things herself that grown-ups used to do for her. She dresses herself (today she is wearing both a dress and a maxi skirt--fashion at its finest), she makes her own lunch (mostly [...]
Why Am I Always Tired?
I often find myself on the verge of falling asleep of late. Like, could-drift-off-at-any-time tired. I accidentally fell asleep while trying to perform child bedtime multiple times this week. I think I was asleep before the girls were; I cannot confirm what happened with them because I was asleep. It seems notably bad when I [...]
Lent: An Exercise in Rationalization
I will not eat refined sugar until Easter. I will not eat *dessert* until Easter. I will not eat dessert unless its has clear nutritional value, like chocolate-covered almonds, which are full of antioxidants and protein. I will not eat unhealthy dessert, except on Sundays. If you completely deprive yourself you are destined to fail, [...]
Pooping at Dinner: A Loving Tribute
I have been thinking often this past week of a friend--now living far away--who tragically lost her five-year old boy while on a family vacation. The tragedy of it hit me in the way such things do: reminding me of how life can be unfair and uncontrollable and sometimes so very painful. I have had a bit [...]
Six little whiles more than usual
When your kids start repeating back phrases, you realize what you must sound like to them. Sometimes it is awesome: Ella's first word was "HEY!" D2 tells me she loves me "so, so, so much." But sometimes, you realize you say some things so often they have become meaningless. Apparently one of mine is "a [...]